by Jill MacGregor


Appearances.

Occasionally deceiving.

When we are children, our minds are usually very full of sparkles, bunnies and cotton candy. Do you remember the first time you realized your sweet perception of reality was not the reality of the situation? Its an eye opener. I’ve got a little story about that.

When I was little, there was this show called Romper Room—do you remember? It was always hosted by Miss Something EndingInY. Like a stripper.

Local kids would be on Romper Room for a week, pimp and demonstrate Romper Room toys and blindly stare into the camera.

My Dad has always worked at TV stations. As a kid, this meant that I would get to go to the station with him sometimes on the weekend and wander amongst the cables and cameras while exploring an empty news set. Yes, it is cool. It meant always having tickets for the Ice Capades, the Circus and the Harlem Globetrotters. And, back when most TV stations had adjoining radio stations before the FCC made its ruling, it meant I had all the free 45’s (records, vinyl, looks like a CD but black) that would fit in the box my Barbie Camper came in. Always good perks for a kid.

So, Romper Room. My folks said I could be on Romper Room if I wanted. Arranged. the host was even going to swing by and get me because it was on her way. Miss Suzy or Peggy or Nancy would stop by and pick me up IN HER CONVERTIBLE and off we’d go to the TV station. Please understand that she might as well have picked me up in her space ship or pumpkin coach because a convertible was that foreign/exotic to me. I would say, “Hey Miss SuzyPeggyNancy…” and she would stop me and say, “Kid, my name’s Magdalena” or something equally exotic …like Mariska Hargitay—“Miss SuzyPeggyNancy is just my name for the show”. And then she’d light up a cigarette. Really.

She might as well have had a scotch in her hand.

I could tell she was a little bad. I didn’t think I’d met a bad adult before. I was fascinated.

And I couldn’t stop thinking about her alter ego name thing—it was like she was a double agent. It was so confusing. Who really knew Miss SuzyPeggyNancy? I felt like I was the only one who had been trusted with her true identity.

So, I am sure you are dying to ask me what it was like to be a child star since I was on Romper Room (hair flip). Well…so…I never got to be ON Romper Room. I got to be NEAR Romper Room.

Let me explain.

Since my Dad was in management at the TV station that aired Romper Room there seemed to be some misplaced sensitivity to this looking like favoritism of some sort. Right, I don’t understand either. And though I was encouraged to have the *Romper Room Experience*, no one wanted the other children to feel the obvious slight (?) that would course through kid world in West Lafayette, Indiana if I were to sit on set. On set with the other kids. And Miss SuzyPeggyNancy.

So, as to not be elitest, I was motioned to sit OFF SET. And watch. Sort of even with the camera man. Kind of in the dark. When the kids grabbed their Romper Stompers and robot walked around their table and chairs, I grabbed mine OFF SET and awkwardly walked around by the cameraman. (Scuse me, pardon me, Mr. Cameraman) When the kids did the Do Bee Dance on set, I did the Do Bee Dance alone in the dark…with the cameraman. FOR A WEEK.

After the show, Miss SuzyPeggyNancy would drive me home in her convertible and do God knows what with the rest of her day. Because at this point, it’s only 7:30 am. Romper Room aired live at the crack of ass—like 6 am or something God forsaken. Maybe Miss SuzyPeggyNancy was just getting off the pole before she came to pick me up for the show—and when she dropped me off she had to hit the hay in preparation for another hard night of entertaining.

“Gentlemen, put your hands together and welcome to the stage…Miss SuzyPeggyNancy!” Clap, clap clap

I bet she had a heart of gold.

So, all that to share with you the first time I completely understood that things are not always what you think they are going to be.

I thought you might enjoy that.