by Jill MacGregor
People have an idea of who you are and what you’ll accomplish.
They’re not always right. Sometimes they miss the mark and coat you in a secret sauce of not quite enough. They can miss the power that runs your engine because you don’t wear your determination like a smile for all to see. How often we allow others limited point of view to control how far we go with our plans and dreams?
It’s time to shake it off.
You know what it feels like to have people believe in you and be 100% in your corner. It makes you feel strong, fortified. It’s the whisper in your ear that tells you “You can do it” when you feel like you are failing. Those people and their belief in you can become the cheerleaders in your head when things aren’t going your way. If you know how right it feels to be supported, why, oh, why do you believe others who don’t see your full potential?
And what is it about these people? You don’t give everyone the power—just certain people– some that you trust more than anyone, others that you don’t care for at all. Amazing. Still you allow the negativity to seep in and limit you.
Why would you choose to lean in for the punch when the choice is completely yours to dodge it? But you close eyes, smile and point to the weakest point on your chin so they will know where to land the punch and do the most damage.
And it builds. Your submission, your passivity, your acceptance, your inability—bit by bit, their red mixes with your blue and before you know it, you forget that everything wasn’t always purple.
Breaking patterns starts with a choice. It doesn’t mean you’ll change things overnight, but it does mean that you are beginning to change.
Ask for what you want
Clearly state what you want whether you think you deserve it or not. Better yet, say it especially because you think you don’t deserve it. Grab it. Run, screaming “mine, mine, mine!!”. This is also the perfect moment to turn around and shake it in the face of the person who said you couldn’t, said you would never, said it was there’s not yours—the person who clouded your judgment and made you forget that you could do anything.
Because you can do anything.
You make a difference
When you decide to embrace certain opinions that people have about you, embrace the positive opinions. You could, oh, I don’t know, just decide to focus on the positive instead of wrapping your arms so tightly around the negative. Do you need a reason? Remember the importance you hold in people’s lives. There is a ripple effect that starts with your words and actions, they kindnesses that you’re not even aware that you offer up. It’s all very important. That ripple makes a wave that touches others and leaves your wake on their shore. You don’t get to witness everyone you touch, with your words and your actions, but it happens none the less.
Get beyond the expected
How do you move past what others expect of you and become superlative? It’s so easy to pause as your back is getting patted, soak in the moment and just stay there. Stop dead in your tracks. Or you fatigue, tell yourself you’ve reached the point you were aiming even if it’s not the case, because you were shooting for ACHIEVMENT.
Your dream has a destination. You chose it before you started on this path. Don’t short yourself.
